pile of fallen leaves
golden in afternoon sun
i will pee on you
to rid the sidewalks
of the crumb-poaching pigeons:
this is my mission
my third nap today
stretch, heave sigh, close eyes, breathe deep
practice makes perfect
Thursday, August 25
Wednesday, August 24
Hobbies
I depend on Overheard in NY and Gawker to distract me from the daily irritation that is my job. So I am inordinately pleased that they've posted some of my observations! Check it out:
Overhead in NY:
The Rainbow Flag Hangs Over Wednesday One-liners
(july 27 2005, 3rd item)
Start the Clock, Wednesday One-liners
(august 24 2005 (today), 2nd item)
Gawker:
Ethan and Uma's Night out
(july 20 2004)
Gawker Stalker
(july 12 2005, clare danes & billy crudup, 8th item)
Overhead in NY:
The Rainbow Flag Hangs Over Wednesday One-liners
(july 27 2005, 3rd item)
Start the Clock, Wednesday One-liners
(august 24 2005 (today), 2nd item)
Gawker:
Ethan and Uma's Night out
(july 20 2004)
Gawker Stalker
(july 12 2005, clare danes & billy crudup, 8th item)
Friday, August 19
Namesake
It's about time Monica got off the computer and let me introduce myself! Zoe Bean Dog here, blog namesake and all-around great dog. I'm not so handy with the keyboard, so my posts will be short but I'll post as often as Monica lets me.
Monica and I go way back. She adopted me in 1999 from a shelter in North Carolina. I've always been good at holding down carpets, but now it's one of my main hobbies.
I also enjoy eating, chasing pigeons, sneezing, begging for tummy rubs, eating, and sucking up to people. And eating. Check back soon for more posts from me!
Wednesday, August 17
Olfactory memory
Thick like cotton
he wrapped his smell
around all he owned
to muffle me.
Stale sharp sour
it stung my nose
buffered his space.
Insulation
he wrapped his smell
around all he owned
to muffle me.
Stale sharp sour
it stung my nose
buffered his space.
Insulation
Thursday, August 11
Catwalk
This morning I saw a guy walking his cat in the park. The cat was wearing a harness and a leash. Now I've heard of people walking their cats, but I had never seen it for myself. It was really strange.
Then again, I think cats in general are pretty strange. Full disclosure: I'm not a cat person. I have a dog, named Zoe (my blog's namesake; more on her to come). I regard cats with some suspicion, much as they regard me. I have known many cats, and we had cats when I was a kid (first Mickey, then Middy). I even like some cats. But I still think they're strange.
There is a cat gang in my neighborhood. I see them almost every day when I walk the dog. Street toughs, these cats. They hiss at my dog from across the street and under cars. We walked past one house with four cats sitting around out front. Zoe stopped to stare, and they came running through the fence at her! One of them pulled a switchblade. I calmed things down, and they retreated to their yard, but I think they were throwing up signs behind our backs as we walked away. I won't be surprised if they all have little tattoos next time I see them. Feline13.
Yeah, cats are strange.
Then again, I think cats in general are pretty strange. Full disclosure: I'm not a cat person. I have a dog, named Zoe (my blog's namesake; more on her to come). I regard cats with some suspicion, much as they regard me. I have known many cats, and we had cats when I was a kid (first Mickey, then Middy). I even like some cats. But I still think they're strange.
There is a cat gang in my neighborhood. I see them almost every day when I walk the dog. Street toughs, these cats. They hiss at my dog from across the street and under cars. We walked past one house with four cats sitting around out front. Zoe stopped to stare, and they came running through the fence at her! One of them pulled a switchblade. I calmed things down, and they retreated to their yard, but I think they were throwing up signs behind our backs as we walked away. I won't be surprised if they all have little tattoos next time I see them. Feline13.
Yeah, cats are strange.
Tuesday, August 2
Public Transit Manifesto
Almost every day, I ride the subway. And almost every day, I am infuriated. Coincidence? I think not. One day, just one day, I'd like to make it all the way to work without wanting to kill someone. And I think, if we all work together, we can make that dream a reality. So here is my Public Transit Manifesto*. Everyone must comply.
*For the record, let me point out that I have personally witnessed every single one of these obnoxious behaviors, most of them more than once.
1. Don't make unnecessary noise.
Don't yawn or sigh audibly. Don't smack your lips. Don't whistle. Don't hum. Don't sing. Turn down your headphones. Don't drum your fingers or tap your nails or rings on any surfaces. If you wish to carry on a conversation, sit/stand near the person/people you're talking to and use your inside voice. Don't talk just to hear your own voice. Don't reprogram your cell phone ringer.
2. The train is not your living room.
Keep your feet on the floor. Keep your shoes on. Don't litter. Don't spit. Don't use other seats as your table, footstool, coat rack, or shopping cart. If you can't eat your snack with one hand, wait til you get home. Don't make out. Don't engage in personal hygiene (brushing your hair; cutting, filing, or painting your nails; putting on makeup or perfume; picking your teeth; picking your nose).
3. You are not the only person here.
Bathe. Wear clean clothes. Brush your teeth. Don't back up without looking to see what or who is behind you. Don't lean on people or rest your bags or coat on them. Take off your backpack/messenger bag/enormous tote bag on the train. Move with purpose onto, in and off the train and on the platform. Don't block train doors, stairs, or station turnstiles. Don't stop suddenly in your tracks or reverse direction without warning. Let people get off the train before trying to get on.
Want to propose some additions to my manifesto? Feel free to comment!
*For the record, let me point out that I have personally witnessed every single one of these obnoxious behaviors, most of them more than once.
1. Don't make unnecessary noise.
Don't yawn or sigh audibly. Don't smack your lips. Don't whistle. Don't hum. Don't sing. Turn down your headphones. Don't drum your fingers or tap your nails or rings on any surfaces. If you wish to carry on a conversation, sit/stand near the person/people you're talking to and use your inside voice. Don't talk just to hear your own voice. Don't reprogram your cell phone ringer.
2. The train is not your living room.
Keep your feet on the floor. Keep your shoes on. Don't litter. Don't spit. Don't use other seats as your table, footstool, coat rack, or shopping cart. If you can't eat your snack with one hand, wait til you get home. Don't make out. Don't engage in personal hygiene (brushing your hair; cutting, filing, or painting your nails; putting on makeup or perfume; picking your teeth; picking your nose).
3. You are not the only person here.
Bathe. Wear clean clothes. Brush your teeth. Don't back up without looking to see what or who is behind you. Don't lean on people or rest your bags or coat on them. Take off your backpack/messenger bag/enormous tote bag on the train. Move with purpose onto, in and off the train and on the platform. Don't block train doors, stairs, or station turnstiles. Don't stop suddenly in your tracks or reverse direction without warning. Let people get off the train before trying to get on.
Want to propose some additions to my manifesto? Feel free to comment!
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